I am stripped, bare to the bones and the bones are not strong. That is how I feel right now. A wobbly child with squishy-bowed femurs who has been holding herself up with Muscles and Will till now. Turns out the strings of attachment to others, the meanings and purposes, business and work, stress and hedonism have kept me dancing but now the strings are cut I feel like a puppet on the ground, unsure how to move myself.
I feel lost, so far into the woods now I don’t know who I am or where I want to go. I have memories of the past, when I felt driven, where it seemed obvious to me where my purpose was (I suspect mostly – to escape, react against what I was not?)..or maybe the adventure itself was enough to fuel me. Can I have that again?
Continue reading Word flow/ Journey of Young Women notes 1
I’ve been doing a lot of flying in the last few years. I’ve noticed that especially when going over northern countries and being in the in-between realms of time zone and place, I can go into a slight trance and do some good meditation/sorting psychic material out. The words below came as I went from an amazing week with Blaze in CT back to California, via Minneapolis which interestingly enough is where the woman running the “journey of young women’ training lives.
I have to claim and note these times of clarity — I’m distilling out drops of my own substance right now, but it’s easy to pour fear into the vessel and completely cloud it and loose who I am again.
– Continue reading Flying from Providence – thoughts from the Air